July 13, We Need Each Other
May they also be together as one so that the world may believe that You have sent me.
John 17:21
Have you heard of the marshmallow test? This is a classic research project that illustrates both the human expression of the lack of self-control as well as delayed gratification. The research was conducted by giving a child a marshmallow with the choice that he or she could eat the marshmallow, or they could wait until the researcher would return several minutes later, at which time they would receive a second marshmallow. As you can imagine, the responses varied. (Videos abound on YouTube featuring kids in successive versions of the original experiment, waiting, playing with, and sometimes eating the first marshmallow, forgoing their chances of a second marshmallow.)
In January 2020, the results of a new version of the experiment were released. In this version, children were paired up, played a game together, and then were sent to a room in pairs and given a cookie with the promise of another if they could wait for it by not eating the first cookie. Some of the children were placed in what researchers called an "interdependent" situation in which they were told they would only get the second cookie if both they and the child they were paired with could wait and refrain from eating. The results showed that the children who were depending on each other waited for the second cookie significantly more often. According to researcher Rebecca Koomen, "In this study, children may have been motivated to delay gratification because they felt they shouldn't let the other child down."[1] “Science Daily” also concluded that “the children were more willing to delay their own personal gratification (eating the cookie) when motivated by cooperative reasons than personal goals.”
I am sure you have already concluded my purpose for referencing the above research. Yes, we are indeed better together than in isolation. I find the timing of the above report interesting. The findings were released in January of 2020, and our culture went into isolation due to a pandemic not too long thereafter. While I realize that such a research on the psychology of children may seem meaningless to some, the proof is indeed valid: we are stronger when dependent upon one another. This reminder reemphasizes the basic need for community, and more specifically our need as the people of God for togetherness.
Togetherness from the beginning. As the church began to grow from conception, togetherness was the human expression of this divine creation: “and when the day of Pentecost had arrived, they were all together in one place” (Acts 2:1). The early church was, “day by day, attending the temple together and breaking bread in their homes, and they received their food with glad and generous hearts” (Acts 2:46). As a result of this unity or togetherness, they were “praising God and having favor with all the people” which led to the Lord adding “to their number day by day those who were being saved” (Act 2:47). As the church grew, encouraging togetherness became a common theme among the apostles’ writings. The togetherness of God’s people became the strength of their witness in a world hostile to the movement and growth of the church. Paul exhorted the church in Ephesus to make every effort to keep the unity of the Spirit (4:3). He encouraged the Christians in Rome to make every effort to do what leads to peace and to mutual edification. (Romans 14:19)
Togetherness Emphasized in Jesus’ Prayer. Such encouragement toward togetherness within the church fulfills the very words of Jesus when He prayed for His followers, “Holy Father, protect them…so they may be one as we are one" (John 17:11). Jesus prayed that His followers would be united, and His prayer extended to all who would come to faith. Jesus’ prayer for the church today expresses the goal of our togetherness: that all of them may be one…so that the world may believe that you have sent me. (17:21)
Togetherness: the foundational witness of the Church. The very essence of the witness of the church exists in the divinely created nature of the church: togetherness. The church is indeed better together than in isolation. So today, I urge you to pray! Pray for the health of the church. Our church. Your church. All churches. Pray that through God’s miraculous workings the church will discover a renewed sense of togetherness that far transcends our former expressions of church life. And as you pray, ask God to show you how to better invest in the togetherness that so characteristically expresses the people of God.
Together! What an amazing truth! What an amazing blessing! “Thank you, God, for the church!”
Blessings.
READ
Read John 17:1-26 and be encouraged by Jesus’ prayer for our togetherness.
[1] Staff, “'Marshmallow test' redux: Children show better self-control when they depend on each other” ScienceDaily.com (1-14-20); Rebecca Koomen, Sebastian Grueneisen, Esther Herrmann. “Children Delay Gratification for Cooperative Ends,” Psychological Science (2020).
